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Are you ready for some truths about motherhood?
Because today I’m here to share the shit no one tells you about motherhood.
The stuff that makes us feel crazy. And alone. When in fact it’s normal. Just no one talks about it.
Like the fact that it’ll fill you up with so much love you could puke at times. Or the fact that you’ll be judged 24/7.
I have it all laid out for you here because, well, I’m tired of no one talking about this stuff. As if motherhood wasn’t hard enough; to feel like you’re crazy and drowning and like you’re the only one is just insane.
That is why over on Instagram I pride myself in sharing the real and raw side of motherhood.
I don’t hold back because what else does that do other than make us feel more alone?
It’s not all sunshine and daisy’s around here.
So here are 10 truths about motherhood.
Some days, you might cry more than them.
I know, starting off strong here. But it’s a cold hard truth. There are days where I just sob while making dinner. Somedays are just that hard.
You might not feel a bond.
This was true for my girl twin. I didn’t feel a bond with her, especially when she had colic and kept me up 24/7. It took a long time for that bond to develop between us. But it does come eventually.
Loneliness is everywhere, even though you’re never alone.
Motherhood is just strange. Though you’re never alone, it feels like the loneliest time and you just ache for some normal adult human interaction. Somedays that means talking the ear off some random person at the grocery store. You know that “target mom culture”? I really think it came from moms simply tired of feeling so alone, so they ventured out to someplace they felt comfortable.
Making new friends is hard.
Here is a hard truth– not all of your friends before motherhood will follow you into it. Especially if they don’t have kids. Motherhood changes a lot of things and sometimes that means old friends just don’t follow along. But then making new friends can be just as difficult. Finding friends that mesh with your parenting style so you don’t feel even more judged than you already are is just hard. But when you find them, hold on tight. Because they are everything.
Mom shaming is everywhere.
One thing you’ll find in motherhood is that EVERYONE has an opinion on eeeeverything that you do. And it sucks. I’ve gotten nasty looks for anything from how I handle a tantrum to how I get my kids out of the car at the store. And god forbid if you bottle feed. My biggest suggestion is to grow a thick skin and remind yourself that you are doing your best and your best IS good enough.
Mom brain sucks.
Really. I thought pregnancy brain was bad. Mom brain is a whole new game! Especially in the beginning when you’re sleep deprived and trying to remember anything at all. Tip? Take notes. Seriously. Of everything.
Sometimes, you’ll scream.
Maybe you won’t. But with how many moms agree with me over on Facebook when I open up about yelling, I have a hard time believing the majority doesn’t scream sometimes in motherhood. It sucks. And it’s something we all can work on. But sometimes you just get to a point where the scream is already belting out of your mouth and theres no stopping it.
You might just turn into your mom.
We all said we’d never turn out like our moms, but girl. I have never felt more like my mom than I have recently. I feel her words come out of my mouth like vomit and now I understand everything she ever said to me as a child.
Your purse and car become disaster zones.
Do not get down on yourself with the mess that comes with motherhood. We’re always running to and from this place or another, leaving little time to actually tidy up as we go. My car and purse are the last on my mind.
You’ll quite literally piss yourself.
I thought I’d end this on a lighter note.
I have quite literally pissed myself in public. Luckily it didn’t show through my leggings, but it happened. A full pee.
But what I’m getting at here is that motherhood isn’t perfect.
No one living it is, and nothing about it is. It’s hard. Harder than anything else in this world.
And I believe that by opening up the conversation and being more open about our journeys can really help us all feel less alone. Less like we’re doing it all wrong. And more like we’re doing our best.
Give yourself grace mama. Live a little. And don’t let motherhood hold you back.