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It’s time to set some healthy boundaries and talk about the importance of holiday season self care.
This post is created in partnership with Lane Bryant sharing my selection of LIVI athleisure wear. All opinions made are mine alone.
2020 + Self care, My Story
Honestly, where do I start?
This year has been SO hard for so many. I’d almost go as far to say as it has been hard for all of us in some capacity or another.
My world flipped upside down this year and I am walking into this holiday season as a newly divorced, single mom of three year old twins who is trying to piece her life together.
Much, much different than years past.
With all that has gone on this year, I have made it a top priority to let the holiday season give me every ounce of holiday joy that it can, and with that comes setting some self care in the form of healthy boundaries.
Not just with others, but with myself as well.
It is so easy this time of year to let the hustle and bustle consume us and fall into the wonderful hands of seasonal depression. And that my friends is just not something I wanted to let get anywhere near me this year.
I have worked SO hard to get myself into a good place and I am finally in one.
Now I am here to help you do the same. I want you to be able to thoroughly enjoy this holiday season regardless of how this year has treated you with some mindful tips in partnership with my friends over at Lane Bryant while sharing some of my favorite cozy favorites from their LIVI line!
Why is holiday season self care important?
Hmm.. how about, why wouldn’t holiday season self care be important?
This time of year is hard. I’d go as far to say it is the hardest time of the year.
So, wouldn’t some quality self care be ideal?
The answer is yes. Always yes.
Taking care of your mind and soul this time of year is crucial in order to avoid seasonal depression and I know you can do this. I know you can get through this season at a bare minimum. I hope you can get through it while also enjoying it with the hand of my holiday season self care ideas.
Holiday season self care ideas
Let’s get to it.
Turn off the music & don’t feel guilty
Like I said above, this one is honestly REALLY hard for me, but I had to draw that boundary within myself. Christmas songs were bringing up so many memories that were putting me back into a dark place, and that is the last thing I want during the holiday season that is already hard in and of itself.
Turn off the Christmas music & forget the guilt.
I promise you that you can enjoy a very full holiday season without drowning yourself in holiday songs that put an ache in your heart.
open those curtains and let in some light
I know most days are dark AF anymore, but still. Open those curtains. Blinds. Whatever you have. Open them up and hell even open a window (if it’s not too chilly) and enjoy the fresh air. The natural light, even on a gloomy day, can do so much for the soul. Same goes for the fresh air.
If you’re feeling up to it- get yourself bundled up and cozy in some of the new LIVI line, then head outside to the porch and drink your coffee while you get some work done. Those moments are always an incredible holiday season reset.
Distance yourself from social media
This time of year can be incredibly difficult for a variety of reasons. Many of us are going into the season in a completely new way, whether it be COVID related, relationship related, or family related. There are so many things that can play in and make the holiday season uncomfortable and one of my best holiday season self care tips is to distance yourself from social media. Even your phone as a whole.
Even with finding closure in my divorce and new chapter in life, I get a gut punch with every “happy family” holiday post I see. There might be a similar situation for you, and you just have to shut it out to take care of your mind. Give yourself a boundary and instead of scrolling through social media while getting hit in the feels over and over again, put your phone down and make some cookies.
Drive around and look for Christmas lights.
Sit on the couch and binge-watch a new show with nothing on but the Christmas tree lights.
Stop self-sabotaging and start self-medicating. Easier said than done, I know. But try it.
Please.
re-discover what is important to you about the holiday season
I challenge you to take a moment to sit with yourself and ask what means the most to you about the holiday season? What fills your holiday season cup?
Write them down. Make your own “bucket list”. And then get out there and make yourself smile.
Honestly, I am so thankful I am not expected to make it to 10 different holiday events this year.
So. Thankful.
Instead, I have been doing what makes my heart genuinely happy, and that includes making tons of Christmas cookies, watching Christmas rom-coms, and taking the long drive home in order to pass by as many Christmas lights as I can.
make a budget & stick to it
Ugh. Holiday spending.
Probably one of the biggest holiday season stressors.
One of my biggest annoyances as an adult has become holiday season gifts.
I hope that doesn’t make me look bad. I bet it does to some. But man, I get so stressed out thinking about how many people I need to shop for. If I buy for this person, then I have to buy for this person and this person. Even if you stick to $10-20 per person, it seriously adds up and I don’t know about you, but I just don’t have the budget for it.
I get so much anxiety when someone asks what I want for a gift. Or that they already bought me something. I know most people don’t expect anything in return, but that doesn’t ease the anxiety over it whatsoever.
So a great way to take care of yourself over the holiday season is to set that budget and let it be. If it would make you feel more comfortable, be honest with your friends and family. Let them know this is where you have to draw the line for yourself and that you’d much rather spend quality time together (over FaceTime, of course).
keep gifts simple
Back to the gifts, but while you’re keeping that budget in mind, remember that gifts don’t have to be wild and everything the recipient has ever dreamed of. Think about the best gifts you’ve ever received. I bet they aren’t super elaborate, expensive gifts. One of my favorite gifts from the last few years that I use all the time is a matte black tumbler. It was such a simple gift, yet super thoughtful since they knew I am always drinking something and wanted to give me something useful!
keep things casual, girl!
Forget limiting simplicity to gifts. Keep the whole season casual.
I mean, if that is what works for you. If going big is how you love to live- by all means, do it! The whole point here is to fill your cup this holiday season.
For me- that is keeping things casual.
I do not, and have not, had any big elaborate plans. Not one. I’m keeping decorations, food, clothes, and even (safe) weekend trips super casual and absolutely loving every second of it.
By adding in the holiday season self care of causality, I have basically eliminated holiday stress. Seriously. Eliminated it.
I am not looking to meet anyones expectations other than my own.
And girl. It feels SO GOOD!
say no & only do what you want to do
Clearly I am big on the boundaries at this point in my life.
Don’t want to add something into your holiday plans?
DON’T!
Not feeling up to something you’ve already committed yourself to?
FORGET IT!
This can be hard sometimes with the kids, especially when you’ve already let them know you have plans for x,y,z, but there are always ways to work with them.
My twins are only three, but if I accidentally let something slip and then decide that thing won’t be happening, I bribe them. Probably not the most ideal thing, but with the mindset of keeping my headspace cozy and safe, there’s gotta be some give.
So, looks like they’re getting their tablets tonight because I am not feeling up to heading out!
you better not push off quality sleep
I’m channeling my therapist with this one.
I am not the best with sleep. Not here to lie to you. But it is something I am actively working on and it is honestly a great holiday season self care idea that you can work on every day that doesn’t necessarily take much.
When I say quality sleep, I don’t just mean go to bed at some point and sleep. I mean get yourself ready for bed. Wash your face. Turn the lights off. Maybe invest in a salt lamp (highly recommend!!) and turn it on for a warm glow. Diffuse some oils. And then give yourself a hard cut off for your phone.
I am looking at you fellow TikTokers. I know what you’re doing at 2am and I promise it isn’t helping you one bit. Good, consistent sleep can literally positively affect your entire life, just as poor sleep does.
Take care of yourself in the simplest way and try to go to sleep a bit earlier than usual tonight.
gift yourself joy this holiday season
Lastly, I want you to have a blissful holiday season. Let yourself be happy. Bring yourself joy. Do those things that make you happy. Dress up your car with some antlers and a red nose. Surround yourself (digitally) with people who make you feel cozy. Gift yourself a few things you’ve been eying.
Like some solid loungewear, for ya know, all of the self-love you’re pouring into yourself this holiday season.
I’ve shared a few of my faves from the LIVI line at Lane Bryant that I’ve been living in and shared on IG last weekend throughout this post, but here are the pieces individually:
I hope you can take what I’ve shared here today and give yourself the gift of a much more peaceful holiday season. You more than deserve it, mama.
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