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There is a stigma around therapy in motherhood that I am here to break down.
Therapy literally saved my motherhood.
Disclosure: I am not a medical professional. All thoughts and opinions made on twinsandcoffee.com are based on my life experiences and personal research. Click here for my full disclosure.
Motherhood & Mental Health
I’m not saying literally to be dramatic & add anything extra to the story. I am using it in the literal sense. I was in the depths of overpowering depression and considering leaving.
Giving everything up. And leaving.
The first time was right before my Bipolar Disorder diagnosis. I had stormed out of the house sobbing and overwhelmed due to another fight with my husband over not being able to explain how I was feeling. I got into my car and drove off. I pulled over a bit down the road into a random parking lot and just lost it.
Everyone would be better off without me. I was suicidal at this point in time, but me wanting to leave had nothing to do with that. I just wanted to run away. My mind was set on the fact that everyone in my life, especially my children, would be way better off without me and my unstable mental health.
I thought about all of the ways their lives would be better. I couldn’t mess them up if I wasn’t around. Maybe they wouldn’t one day feel what I feel if I didn’t expose them to it.
The thoughts spiraled from there. Anxiety attack ensued and I managed to use siri to call my mom because I couldn’t use my phone at this point between the blurred vision and trembling hands.
Soon after, I found some help and started meeting with a therapist regularly. I’ve explained these feelings and we have worked through bits of them. It is a process, though.
Since my diagnosis, I’ve had two major spells of low low depression. The low feeling that makes me want to give up and face the fact that my twins are better off without me.
Each time, I am brought out thanks to therapy.
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Therapy Saved my Motherhood Experience
Therapy in motherhood has saved me. It’s taught me so much and truly has helped me grow into who I am now nearly a year and a half later.
It seems like such a SHORT amount of time. But if you were a close friend of mine before that life changing diagnosis and had followed me to today, you’d see just how much change has happened. How much I have grown and truly evolved.
I am no where near perfect. Not close at all. But I no longer want to walk away. I feel the power within myself to fight for a better future and to keep trying when things get hard.
Why Therapy is Important for moms
I am a firm believer that no matter where you fall on the mental health spectrum, you could always benefit from therapy. Everyone has things they could work on. Some will be more intense than others. But honestly, my favorite part about working with a therapist is being able to bounce my thoughts off of someone else. Someone who isn’t in my life and staring back at me after I spill out all of my darkest secrets.
Therapy has helped me with so many things that go beyond managing Bipolar Disorder, and I’ll get into some of them as we go on here but I fully stance behind it’s importance in motherhood for figuring all kinds of shit out.
You Deserve to be Healthy
Therapy helps in so many ways, and like I said, for such a variety of reasons. It’s a great way to check back with your mental health in ways you cannot do on your own. A therapist will ask you questions that you’ve never considered asking yourself. Odds are, the conversations between you and your therapist will open your eyes to entirely new things.
Beyond that, you deserve to be healthy. If you broke your arm, you wouldn’t just let it heal itself. You’d get proper help. Same with your mental health.
Motherhood is Challenging
Does this even need an explaination?
Motherhood is hard AF. Get someone in your corner to help you through it. Two someones. A best friend & a therapist.
Your Children Deserve a Mentally Healthy Mom
This was the hardest pill for me to swallow. Before I was able to realize I needed to get help for myself, I recognized that it needed to be for my babies. As much as I thought they didn’t need me, I was wrong. I can show them how strong a woman can be. I can help them see how to fight for the help you deserve and how to fight for yourself period. How to be strong. But also how to break down and keep moving forward. Your littles deserve the same. They deserve a mama working towards helping herself & therapy is that first step.
Mental Health is as Important as Physical Health
Like I said above, you would treat your physical health instantly. Right? Flu, broken arm, diabetes. You’d get some level of help. Now, I need you to think the same with regard to your mental health. You deserve to take care of yourself.
You’re Setting an Example
Beyond anything else, you have little eyes watching your every move. I hope that by being vulnerable and opening up to others, might it be my therapist or the world here through my new blog, my babies see me as a strong & powerful woman capable of anything. I think by doing these sorts of scary things, we’ll be able to normalize taking care of our mental health and hopefully raise children who won’t be afraid to ask for help should they need it.
If you are at the point of wanting to discuss your situation with a therapist, I highly recommend BetterHelp.com. You can read more about them here.